Thank you for your patience. The post I planned for yesterday no longer felt right, and what I sensed I should write needed time to be written with the right words.

This past weekend, our region learned of the death of Jamey Rodemeyer, a 14 year old boy who was struggling with some significant issues in his life. He was also dealing with bullies. On top of all of the personal challenges he faced as a teenager, he was subjected to painful ridicule and verbal abuse. His pain led him to take his own life.

I did not know Jamey, and I cannot begin to understand all that he thought or felt, but I do know his death is tragic. There is no question, bullying is bad. It is a form of verbal violence that attacks a person’s identity and erodes their sense of self-worth and their sense of safety. It is bad and it is painful.

I have no knowledge of the specific abuses this young man experienced, but I do know what it feels like to be on the receiving end of these painful attacks. I have clear memories of hurtful words and embarrassing moments. I remember the physical intimidation that included being chased through school by someone trying to stab me with scissors because he just didn’t like me, and the Halloween night, two peers tried to set me on fire just for fun. Words and actions like that can hurt deeper than we imagine.

As I reflected on the sad events of this weekend, I was struck by the reality that bullying does not just take place at school and bullies are not just teenagers. Part of the culture that continues to produce people who take pleasure in the pain of others is the reality that many adults model exactly that type of behavior. I meet grown men and women who still deal with their own issues by attacking others, in what they do and what they say. This behavior becomes a living illustration to people who look up to them that meanness and cruelty are acceptable if we “feel” justified, or if we believe someone deserved it.

No one deserves it, and there is no justification for hatred. All of us are created in the image of God. We are his workmanship, created for good things. Even from the first creation, God saw all that was made and called it, “good.” Humanity, he called, “very good.” How can we hate what God made in the Divine image and called very good?

We are called to be living examples of God’s goodness. We need to teach one another, our children and all those God places within our sphere of influence how to act out of love. People need to understand the impact of their actions and words on the hearts and spirits of others around them. We have a calling to be role models of grace and love who treasure each life as Jesus does, and who teach others to do the same.

Bullies may always exist, but that should never make their actions acceptable, nor should we ever become insensitive to the pain they create. Since God is love, then we need to demonstrate the transforming power of love to the world, including those who suffer from the painful acts of others, and those who commit such acts. We will not make things better by hating the haters. Instead, we must break the cycles that produce hatred in the first place and become examples of how to live without it.

There is no better day to show God’s love than today and no better time to start than right now. As the old camp song said, “They will know we are Christians by our love.”

May it be so, even now.