Recently, I had to take a small break from my exercise routine. After I received the go ahead to return, I found that the break had given birth to significant decrease in my desire to hit the gym. I frequently found myself saying, “I should get started again,” or, “I really should go back to the gym,” but what I did not find was myself doing anything about it.
The truth was, as much as I knew I needed the workout, I didn’t feel like exercising. There were so many other things filling my schedule and the idea of making time for the treadmill and the weights was not inspiring. Every day I would promise myself that, “tomorrow, I will start again,” and every tomorrow, I would put it off for one more day.
Finally, I knew that without some planning, I would be saying the same things this time next year, so I set a date and made the commitment that no matter what happened, I was going back on that day. The day came, but my desire did not. I made a promise to myself and I was going to keep it, but I knew I didn’t want to. My lethargic packing of the gym bag was a visible sign of my internal struggle and I even found myself lingering with the thought that someone might call to say they needed me right then. It didn’t happen.
I drove to the gym, checked in and went to change in the locker room. I decided that I would do a little time on the treadmill and go home. At least I will have started, I thought. The first few minutes were difficult, but as my endorphins kicked in and my iPod provided the motivating rhythm, I found myself starting to enjoy the exercise once again. Before long, I was smiling and moving faster and in the end, I did more than I expected to do. The feelings were not there to begin with, but taking action ultimately created them afresh for me.
I thought about how similar this experience was to parts of my spiritual journey. Sometimes, I don’t feel like being spiritual. I don’t always want to go to church, read my Bible or pray. The truth is, my feelings frequently do not line up with my priorities and, if I chose to follow my feelings, my spiritual life would be tumultuous at best. Therefore, I can not simply follow my feelings. Instead, I must choose a course and stick to it, even when my motivation is weak.
The interesting thing is, just like my experience on the treadmill, when I begin to take action in my spiritual life, the feelings often follow. Once I’ve taken the first few steps, my motivation to continue increases. I start praying, reading Scripture or worshipping and soon, I am amazed how much time has past. Once I make the effort to start, I am rewarded by more energy to continue.
Certainly there are times when what is before us is just hard work. Physically, mentally and spiritually there will be moments or seasons when we must simply press through. However, frequently making the commitment to begin and following through on that commitment can open the door to increased motivation and desire. Many of the most important journeys in our lives will begin with that small step.
